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I’ve had my longest dry spell in publication in many, many months. But the curse broke this week with the publication of my little story “The Mt. Meager Expedition” in the lovely journal Danse Macabre. I’m very grateful to Adam Henry Carrière, Danse Macabre’s editor, for taking on this odd little absurdity of a story–extra points to any readers who can find a quote from David Petraeus hiding here!

DM du Jour

From The Autobiography of St. Morris Roger Lindenford-Fitzroy, Lord Chadwick

Chapter LXVII: The Mount Meager Expedition

My service as His Majesty’s Secretary of State for War coincided neatly with the end of the War on Poverty and the beginning of the First Balkan War, a seven-year period during which our country also fought wars against Illiteracy and the Khedivate of Egypt, as well as suppressed insurgencies in British Honduras, Algebra, Southern Rhodesia, and the Marianas Trench. Given our daunting expenditure of blood and treasure over all corners of the Empire, therefore, the gentle reader may imagine my dismay when the Prime Minister requested that The War Office prepare a dossier investigating the feasibility of a war against lupines.

I had grown up believing the lupine a particularly glorious summer flower, so far as I knew entirely peaceable and not at all contentious. Indeed, in my boyhood my mother had led…

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